Thursday, November 15, 2012

Save A Tree, Not A Boyfriend

Dear Claire,

If you end up anything like me, you're going to have a bleeding heart for people.  You're going to want to help others, you're going to stick your neck out for friends, and you're going to do try to lift people up.

This is (I think anyway) a great way to be.  I like helping people, I like seeing people succeed and I feel best about myself when I'm helping others reach their potential. 

So....I followed my passion and found a job that lets me do this five days a week.

If you want to help people, then help people.  Just make sure your boyfriend (and definitetly not your husband) is not the person who needs to be helped. 

Obviously, we're all humans and we've all got baggage.  But be attracted to someone who can carry at least a few of their own suitcases.

Obviously, when your partner is down or going through a difficult time, you've got to be there for them.  But be attracted to someone who actually wants to solve their problems, overcome their issues, and aim to be a better person.

Because, you can't save people.

You can help people, you can guide people, you can provide opportunities for people.  But you can't save people.

And all that helping, guiding, and providing takes a lot of time and a lot of energy.  Your home should be your soft place, your easy place.  Life, marriage, and mothering will be hard enough on it's own without having to save your husband too.  So my advice, find someone who needs a shoulder to lean on once in a while or an ear to listen, not someone who needs you to be their life preserver.

Love you when you've found your match,

1 comment:

  1. Just found your blog through Sweet Pea Sylvie's blog hop, i'm a new follower :)