Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Have a Best Friend (or two or three)

Dear Claire,

Having a best friend is crucial.  Find one immediately.

Okay, maybe that's a bit dramatic, but here's the thing: you are going to need someone to talk to.

There are going to be days (and maybe even months) when you don't want to talk to me or daddy about things that are bothering you, exciting you, or just weighing on your mind. You'll need a bestie to talk with.

There are going to be times when your boyfriend or husband is driving you crazy and you'll really need someone to vent to.  Call your bestie!

There are going to be times when you're own children are slowly pushing you towards the insane asylum.  Call your bestie!

One of mommy's dearest friends in the world is Leanne and she's not feeling well today so let's dedicate this post to her and maybe it will cheer her up!

Here are some great reasons to have a best friend (and some silly things that Mommy and Leanne have experienced)

#1) Someone to plan your life with!  You can throw out all sorts of wild and wonderful ideas about where you want your life to head and this person will support you 99%.  I say 99% because a real bestie will tell you when you've really lost the plot and help you get back on track. (ask Leanne about the condo with the fire-man pole...we may still purchase one for our retirement years)

#2) Someone to have sleepovers with!  Horray for sleepoves!  Sleepovers are the best time to share your secrets, your hopes, and your hangups.  You can laugh, watch cheesy movies, and maybe even gossip for a few minutes. (ask Leanne about our very first sleepover)

#3) Someone to shop with.  Nothing else needs to be said about this one.

#4) Someone to plan your wedding with.  Let's be honest, chances are that your finace isn't going to care about flowers, place cards, or the proper etiquette for hosting a bridal shower.  Insert your best friend who will gladly obsess over each of these details with you. (ask Leanne about all the crazy wedding mishaps...including Mommy throwing up 4 times the morning of Leanne's wedding due to a teeny-tiny Claire in my belly)

#5) Someone to gently tell you the truth.  This person will kindly let you know when they're worried about something you're doing.  They'll be honest with you when you ask them to be, especially about a precarious haircut or boyfriend who you know, deep down, you should probably break up with. (I'm sure Leanne will happily tell you about a few duds I dated before meeting Daddy)

#6) Someone who will never judge you because they love you!  Your best friend may not always agree with everything you do, but she will love you regardless.  She won't judge you, or remind you about past bad decisions, she'll just be there for you.  So make sure you're there for her too!

Love you Claire, Love your best friend, and Love you Leanne!

Mom and Lindsay

Thursday, November 15, 2012

Save A Tree, Not A Boyfriend

Dear Claire,

If you end up anything like me, you're going to have a bleeding heart for people.  You're going to want to help others, you're going to stick your neck out for friends, and you're going to do try to lift people up.

This is (I think anyway) a great way to be.  I like helping people, I like seeing people succeed and I feel best about myself when I'm helping others reach their potential. 

So....I followed my passion and found a job that lets me do this five days a week.

If you want to help people, then help people.  Just make sure your boyfriend (and definitetly not your husband) is not the person who needs to be helped. 

Obviously, we're all humans and we've all got baggage.  But be attracted to someone who can carry at least a few of their own suitcases.

Obviously, when your partner is down or going through a difficult time, you've got to be there for them.  But be attracted to someone who actually wants to solve their problems, overcome their issues, and aim to be a better person.

Because, you can't save people.

You can help people, you can guide people, you can provide opportunities for people.  But you can't save people.

And all that helping, guiding, and providing takes a lot of time and a lot of energy.  Your home should be your soft place, your easy place.  Life, marriage, and mothering will be hard enough on it's own without having to save your husband too.  So my advice, find someone who needs a shoulder to lean on once in a while or an ear to listen, not someone who needs you to be their life preserver.

Love you when you've found your match,

Thursday, November 8, 2012

People Are Good

Dear Claire,

Today I was overwhelmed by the kindness of others.

Right now, I'm working with a young girl, who is living in awful conditions.  She has lost over fifteen pounds in the past two months, not because she is dieting, but because she can only afford to eat one meal a day.

Now that I have you, it's just unbearable to see young girls living like this.  I can't help but imagine what I would do, if suddenly, you were forced to live like this.

In speaking with this girl, I learned that she needs some winter clothing and a few things for her house - a pillow and a blanket.  I know that she needs more, but is too proud to ask.

I quickly posted her needs on my 'Facebook' page and within minutes, several people contacted me with everything from clothing, to food and giftcards for this young woman.

So, whenever you're with a group of people, or watching the news, and everything is doom and gloom, remember that is not the whole truth.  The truth is that, time and time again, people are good.

I know that you will know this instinctively.  Because, you, my sweet little girl, will be good too.

Love Mom

Thanks to all those who are helping :)

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Someone To Look Up To

Dear Claire,

I don't know what things will be like when you're a bit older, but right now, it seems really hard for young girls to find a decent role model.

Obviously, there are amazing young women out there doing amazing things, but they seem to get a pin-head of media attention while the women who are spiraling out of control, are on the front page of every magazine.

However, once in a while, along comes a woman who graces the covers of magazines because of her talent, humility, and grace.

Enter Kate Winslet.

Most important, Kate is one sheer force when it comes to her acting chops.  I mean seriously, she's been nominated for SIX academy awards and even won for best actress.  The best part about Kate, is that she takes on serious roles.  She's not afraid to play kind women, lost women, cruel women, broken women.  Love her.

Kate is also fantastic because she's comfortable and honest about her body.  So many women, especially ones in the public eye, force themselves to remain rail thin, and after awhile, they really all seem to look alike.  Kate is different, she's a natural beauty who has made the decision to remain, naturally beautiful.

And in the spirit of giving and taking advice...I promise to take this nugget from Kate:

"I accept my body. I accept how I am and make the best of what I am given. Children orientate towards examples. That's why I talk solely positive about my body in front of my daughter."

Love Mom

What's your favourite Kate Winslet movie????

Thursday, November 1, 2012

A Room of One's Own

Dear Claire,

Every woman needs a room of her own.  A place she can go to unwind, to explore something new, to read, to write, to think, and to 'just be'. 

A place where you can listen to your favourite song again and again without interruption.

A place where you can sing into your hairbrush without being watched.

A place where you can sprawl out and daydream.

A place where you can create something beautiful.

Last weekend I made a little place for you....

Love you,

Empty, Dull Closet

Claire's New "Closet Club House"

P.S. Our house was built in the 1940's so we have a couple of "funny" closets which have slanted ceilings and aren't really that great for storing much.  So...might as well do something fun with them!

Readers - Did you have a special place of your own when you were little? 

P.P.S. - If you liked this post, please hit the 'facebook' button below and share it on your facebook page :) Thanks!