There will probably be at least, a few times in your life, when something just doesn't sit right with you. You will witness something that just feels wrong - in your heart and in your gut.
It will be your decision whether to speak up. You won't always speak up and that's okay, but sometimes you will.
In order to speak up, you have to know what you stand for. What do you believe in? How do you feel people should be treated? Do some people deserve to be mistreated? What bothers you? What keeps you up at night wondering?
What you stand for will change and grow as you do. Your perspectives and beliefs may widen at times and narrow at others. This is okay. This is part of life.
You'll also learn, that in life, there is very little, that is black and white. Almost everything lies somewhere in between, in the gray area.
Once you figure out what you stand for, don't focus on shoving it down everybody else's throat. You have your beliefs, and they have theirs. Share you feelings, ideas, and opinions and allow others to share their's. Listen to them. Really listen. It is often that there is no wrong, only different areas of right. So just listen and learn from the people you know and the people you meet.
Some of the things I stand for:
1. People being treated with respect and kindness regardless of how they look. 2. People choosing their religious, or lack thereof, beliefs. 3. People having second, third, and fourth chances in life, but not neccessarily with the same people. 4. Healthy relationships where both people are safe, happy, and thriving. 5. Listening to someone's story to get the full sense of where they have been, where they are now, and where they hope to be going.
Growing up in a stereo-typical, middle-class family in a small Canadian town means, that it may at times, be difficult to understand and recognize, how truly fortunate you are.
Most of your classmates and friends will have shoes on their feet, clothes on their backs, and a roof over their head. Many of them will get to play soccer each summer and go skating in the winter. Some of them will go on family vacations, have cottages, and always have the newest technology.
Chances are, you'll probably want to have and do all of these things, and I hope that you are able to.
There's nothing wrong with having, and doing, and experiencing the best that life has to offer, as long as you are grateful and appreciate all that you have.
Unfortunately, there is no way you'll be able to appreciate what you have, unless you recognize all the things many people in our community, country, and world live without. You won't really appreciate going on a vacation until you learn that many people never get a few hundred kilometers past the town they were born in. You won't appreciate your new 'back-to-school' clothes, until you know of a family who is struggling just to buy new shoes.
One day, if you work hard in school and are able to save extra money, you may be able to travel and see first-hand what real poverty looks like; then you will really appreciate all that you have.
Until then you can get a glimpse of poverty, war, imprisonment, and all the other struggles I hope you never personally experience, through good literature, through reading the newspaper, and through watching the news. Hopefully this will help you empathize with people whether you know them or not. Hopefully this will help you appreciate all the gifts you were given due only to your place of birth. And above all, hopefully this will encourage you to help others in whatever way you are able.
Here are some great books I read growing up which truly altered the way I saw other people and the struggles that were forced upon them:
Any girl who knows anything, knows that 'Feminism' is not a dirty word.
Hello - like to vote much? Feel like you should be paid the same as men for doing the same job? Think that women in other countries should be allowed equal rights if they want them (and of course they do!). Think you should get to make decisions about your own body. Then don't be crazy; you're a feminist. And nothing is more timeless than equal rights.
Life is going to throw many, many surprises at you. Things you can't control, things you have to react to immediately, and things that nothing can prepare you for. Whenever you encounter these surprises...just follow your heart, your gut, and use your common sense.
For everything else...prepare!
If you want to decrease stress and increase your self-confidence, then prepare for anything and everything that can be prepared for.
Test or exam - prepare.
Job interview or audition - prepare.
Going for groceries or buying a car - prepare.
I can't tell you the number of errors, mishaps, and stumbles I have witnessed only because the person simply didn't practice or prepare beforehand.
You are your own best teacher, you will learn the most from the mistakes you are able to recognize and correct on your own.
You can't recognize or correct mistakes that you don't look for ahead of time.
Some people will tell you they work best under pressure and they will procrastinate until the last second. I always wonder how much better that person could have done if they simply gave themself the time to really work on something and to improve it before sharing it?
No one who is hugely successful at what they do, has become so on a whim or because of luck. They have put in the time, the patience, and the willingness to improve their areas of weakness.
And this is the thing...those surprises that life throws at you...you'll find that the more prepared you are in your daily life, the easier it is to handle the curveballs that are thrown at you.
In life you will learn that there are very few things you can truly call your own. Everything is shared, communicated, and spilled out into the world at record pace. It is during a time like this, that is even more crucial to find something that is yours and yours alone. Reading can be this escape.
Reading, and a deep love for books, will be one of the greatest gifts you can indulge in. Through reading you will learn about far away places, places just around the corner, and places that only an imagination can create. You will learn about people who are like you, people who you want to be, and people you wish to avoid meeting. You will also meet yourself. You will find characters you feel so close to and understand so completely that you will wish they were real so that you could ask them questions, seek advice, and share a part of yourself with them.
Reading will teach you to empathize with others, to feel types of pain that you've never actually experienced, and to want to reach out and help those who need it. Reading will teach you joy, to be so thrilled for a character and to want that same joy for those around you. Reading will teach you freedom, it will encourage you to travel, seek adventures, find new people for your life, and to know no limits for what you can accomplish. Reading will teach you to imagine, to believe that a made-up land is completely real, so real that you can picture yourself there just as clearly as you can picture yourself here.
Growing up and growing older I have loved so many books, here are some of my favourites that I hope you'll read too:
Underground to Canada - Barbara Smucker Starring Sally J Freeman as Herself - Judy Blume Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing - Judy Blume Witches - Roald Dahl The Diary of Anne Frank - Anne Frank The Bridges of Madison County - Robert James Waller A Handmaid's Tale - Margaret Atwood Stranger Music - Leonard Cohen The World According to Garp - John Irving Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell Harry Potter - J.K. Rawling (I've only read the first one so we can read the rest together!)
There are SOOOO many more - can't wait to read one with you :)
